Part 5 Book 8 Chapter 2 Another Step Backwards
On the following day, at the same hour, Jean Valjean came.
Cosette asked him no questions, was no longer astonished, no longer exclaimed that she was cold, no longer spoke of the drawing-room, she avoided saying either "father" or "Monsieur Jean." She allowed herself to be addressed as you. She allowed herself to be called Madame. Only, her joy had undergone a certain diminution. She would have been sad, if sadness had been possible to her.
It is probable that she had had with Marius one of those conversations in which the beloved man says what he pleases, explains nothing, and satisfies the beloved woman. The curiosity of lovers does not extend very far beyond their own love.
The lower room had made a little toilet. Basque had suppressed the bottles, and Nicolette the spiders.
All the days which followed brought Jean Valjean at the same hour. He came every day, because he had not the strength to take Marius' words otherwise than literally. Marius arranged matters so as to be absent at the hours when Jean Valjean came. The house grew accustomed to the novel ways of M. Fauchelevent. Toussaint helped in this direction: "Monsieur has always been like that," she repeated. The grandfather issued this decree:--"He's an original." And all was said. Moreover, at the age of ninety-six, no bond is any longer possible, all is merely juxtaposition; a newcomer is in the way.There is no longer any room; all habits are acquired. M. Fauchelevent, M. Tranchelevent, Father Gillenormand asked nothing better than to be relieved from "that gentleman." He added:--"Nothing is more common than those originals. They do all sorts of queer things. They have no reason. The Marquis de Canaples was still worse. He bought a palace that he might lodge in the garret. These are fantastic appearances that people affect."
No one caught a glimpse of the sinister foundation. And moreover, who could have guessed such a thing? There are marshes of this description in India. The water seems extraordinary, inexplicable, rippling though there is no wind, and agitated where it should be calm. One gazes at the surface of these causeless ebullitions; one does not perceive the hydra which crawls on the bottom.
Many men have a secret monster in this same manner, a dragon which gnaws them, a despair which inhabits their night. Such a man resembles other men, he goes and comes. No one knows that he bears within him a frightful parasitic pain with a thousand teeth, which lives within the unhappy man, and of which he is dying. No one knows that this man is a gulf. He is stagnant but deep. From time to time, a trouble of which the onlooker understands nothing appears on his surface. A mysterious wrinkle is formed, then vanishes, then re-appears; an air-bubble rises and bursts. It is the breathing of the unknown beast.
Certain strange habits: arriving at the hour when other people are taking their leave, keeping in the background when other people are displaying themselves, preserving on all occasions what may be designated as the wall-colored mantle, seeking the solitary walk, preferring the deserted street, avoiding any share in conversation, avoiding crowds and festivals, seeming at one's ease and living poorly, having one's key in one's pocket, and one's candle at the porter's lodge, however rich one may be, entering by the side door, ascending the private staircase,--all these insignificant singularities, fugitive folds on the surface, often proceed from a formidable foundation.
Many weeks passed in this manner. A new life gradually took possession of Cosette: the relations which marriage creates, visits, the care of the house, pleasures, great matters. Cosette's pleasures were not costly, they consisted in one thing: being with Marius. The great occupation of her life was to go out with him, to remain with him. It was for them a joy that was always fresh, to go out arm in arm, in the face of the sun, in the open street, without hiding themselves, before the whole world, both of them completely alone.
Cosette had one vexation. Toussaint could not get on with Nicolette, the soldering of two elderly maids being impossible, and she went away. The grandfather was well; Marius argued a case here and there; Aunt Gillenormand peacefully led that life aside which sufficed for her, beside the new household. Jean Valjean came every day.
The address as thou disappeared, the you, the "Madame," the "Monsieur Jean," rendered him another person to Cosette. The care which he had himself taken to detach her from him was succeeding. She became more and more gay and less and less tender. Yet she still loved him sincerely, and he felt it.
One day she said to him suddenly: "You used to be my father, you are no longer my father, you were my uncle, you are no longer my uncle, you were Monsieur Fauchelevent, you are Jean. Who are you then? I don't like all this. If I did not know how good you are, I should be afraid of you."
He still lived in the Rue de l'Homme Arme, because he could not make up his mind to remove to a distance from the quarter where Cosette dwelt.
At first, he only remained a few minutes with Cosette, and then went away.
Little by little he acquired the habit of making his visits less brief. One would have said that he was taking advantage of the authorization of the days which were lengthening, he arrived earlier and departed later.
One day Cosette chanced to say "father" to him. A flash of joy illuminated Jean Valjean's melancholy old countenance.He caught her up: "Say Jean."--"Ah! truly," she replied with a burst of laughter, "Monsieur Jean."--"That is right," said he. And he turned aside so that she might not see him wipe his eyes.
第二天，在同一时刻冉阿让来了。
珂赛特不再问他，不再表示惊讶，不再叫她觉得冷，不再提客厅的事了；她避免称他父亲或让先生，她任他称“您”，任他称“夫人”，只是她的欢乐减弱了。如果她有可能愁闷的话，她会发愁的。
很可能她和马吕斯已作过一次这样的谈话，她的爱人在这次谈话里说了要说的话但不加任何解释，而且还使爱妻满意。相爱的人对爱情之外的事物好奇心是不会太大的。
地下室被稍稍整理了一下。巴斯克拿走了瓶子，妮珂莱特清除了蜘蛛网。
这之后，在这同一时刻冉阿让都来到。他每天来，他没有勇气不照马吕斯所说的来办。马吕斯则设法让自己在冉阿让来时不在家。家里人对割风先生这种新的情况也习惯了。杜桑也帮着解释。“先生一贯就是这样的。”她这样重复着。外祖父作了这样一个结论：“这是一个怪人。”一句话就道尽一切。此外九十岁的人不可能还有什么交往，一切都只是凑合而已，来一个新人不免使人感到拘束，已没有空位置了；一切习惯都已养成。割风先生，切风先生，吉诺曼外祖父觉得最好这位“先生”别来。他还说：“这种怪人是常见的。他们经常做些怪事。什么目的？没有。戈那勃勒侯爵比他更怪。他买了一座宫殿，自己却住在阁楼里。有些人是会有这种古怪的表现的！”
没有人能隐隐约约地感到隐藏着的可怕的东西。谁能去猜这样的事？印度有种沼泽，那里的水好象很特别，无法理解，无风时水生波纹；该平静处却会起浪。人们看到水面无故波涛起伏，但看不到水底有条七头蛇在爬行。
这样很多人都有一种秘密的怪物，一种自己养成的病痛；一条啃啮他们的龙，一种使他们在夜间不得安息的绝望。这种人和其他人一样，来来去去。我们不知道他有着一种痛苦，一种可怕的长着一千颗牙的生物寄生在这悲惨的人的身上，导致他的死亡。我们不知道这人是个深渊，他是死水，深极了。不知什么缘故水面偶尔出现混乱。一圈神秘的水纹，忽然不见了，忽然又出现；一个水泡升上来又破灭了。这是不足道的小事一件，但却很可怕。这是只人所不知的野兽在呼吸。
人有某些古怪的习惯，有人在别人离去时来到，在别人炫耀时隐藏，一切场合他都穿上一件我们称作土墙那种颜色的外衣，专找僻静的小路，喜欢无人走的街。不参加别人的谈话，避开人群和节日，貌似宽裕其实却很清寒，尽管很富，但还总是自己装着钥匙，烛台放在门房里，从小门进来，走隐秘的楼梯，所有这些无关紧要的奇特的举动，诸如涟漪、气泡、水面转瞬即逝的波纹，常常是来自一个可怕的深处。
几个星期就这样过去了。一种新的生活慢慢地支配了珂赛特；婚后有种种事务如拜客、家务、娱乐等这些大事。珂赛特的娱乐并不费钱，主要可以归纳为一项：和马吕斯在一起。和他一同出去，和他待在一起，这是她生活里的大事。他们随时手挽手一同上街，在阳光下，在大路上，不用躲避，就他们两人，出现在众人面前，对他们来说这永远是种新的欢乐。珂赛特有件不称心的事，就是杜桑因和妮珂莱特合不来而离去了。要使两个老处女处得好是不可能的。外祖父身体很好；马吕斯有时为几起诉讼出庭辩护；吉诺曼姨妈安静而知足地在新夫妇身旁过着她的次要地位的生活。冉阿让每日都来。用“你”的称呼不见了，用的是“您”、“夫人”和“让先生”，这样使他在珂赛特面前就不一样了。他设法使珂赛特和他疏远，这已有了成效。她越来越快乐，而温情却一天比一天少下去。其实她仍很爱他，这一点他也感觉得到。有一天她忽然向他说：“您曾是我的父亲，现在不是了，您曾是我的叔叔，现在不是了，您本是割风先生，而现在却成让先生了。您究竟是什么人呢？我不喜欢这些。如果我不知道您是这样的善良，那我见您就会害怕了。”
他仍住在武人街，下不了决心离开珂赛特居住的地区。
开始时他只和珂赛特在一起待上几分钟就走了。
慢慢地他养成了把探望时间延长一点的习惯，就象是由于白天长了，他也可以这样做一样，他来得早一点，离开得晚一点。
有一天珂赛特脱口叫了他一声“父亲”。冉阿让年老阴沉的脸上闪过一道快乐的光，他关照她：“叫让。”“啊，对了，”她一边大笑一边答话，“让先生。”“很好，”他说。他转过身去不让她看见他在擦他的眼睛。