Part 3 Book 1 Chapter 8 In which the Reader will find a Char

In summer, he metamorphoses himself into a frog; and in the evening, when night is falling, in front of the bridges of Austerlitz and Jena, from the tops of coal wagons, and the washerwomen's boats, he hurls himself headlong into the Seine, and into all possible infractions of the laws of modesty and of the police. Nevertheless the police keep an eye on him, and the result is a highly dramatic situation which once gave rise to a fraternal and memorable cry; that cry which was celebrated about 1830, is a strategic warning from gamin to gamin; it scans like a verse from Homer, with a notation as inexpressible as the eleusiac chant of the Panathenaea, and in it one encounters again the ancient Evohe. Here it is: "Ohe, Titi, oheee! Here comes the bobby, here comes the p'lice, pick up your duds and be off, through the sewer with you!"

Sometimes this gnat--that is what he calls himself--knows how to read; sometimes he knows how to write; he always knows how to daub. He does not hesitate to acquire, by no one knows what mysterious mutual instruction, all the talents which can be of use to the public; from 1815 to 1830, he imitated the cry of the turkey; from 1830 to 1848, he scrawled pears on the walls. One summer evening, when Louis Philippe was returning home on foot, he saw a little fellow, no higher than his knee, perspiring and climbing up to draw a gigantic pear in charcoal on one of the pillars of the gate of Neuilly; the King, with that good-nature which came to him from Henry IV., helped the gamin, finished the pear, and gave the child a louis, saying: "The pear is on that also."[19] The gamin loves uproar. A certain state of violence pleases him. He execrates "the cures." One day, in the Rue de l'Universite, one of these scamps was putting his thumb to his nose at the carriage gate of No. 69. "Why are you doing that at the gate?" a passer-by asked. The boy replied: "There is a cure there." It was there, in fact, that the Papal Nuncio lived.

[19] Louis XVIII. is represented in comic pictures of that day as having a pear-shaped head.

Nevertheless, whatever may be the Voltairianism of the small gamin, if the occasion to become a chorister presents itself, it is quite possible that he will accept, and in that case he serves the mass civilly. There are two things to which he plays Tantalus, and which he always desires without ever attaining them: to overthrow the government, and to get his trousers sewed up again.

The gamin in his perfect state possesses all the policemen of Paris, and can always put the name to the face of any one which he chances to meet. He can tell them off on the tips of his fingers. He studies their habits, and he has special notes on each one of them. He reads the souls of the police like an open book. He will tell you fluently and without flinching: "Such an one is a traitor; such another is very malicious; such another is great; such another is ridiculous." (All these words: traitor, malicious, great, ridiculous, have a particular meaning in his mouth.) That one imagines that he owns the Pont-Neuf, and he prevents people from walking on the cornice outside the parapet; that other has a mania for pulling person's ears; etc., etc.

到了夏季,他转化为青蛙,当夕阳西沉黑夜将临时,在奥斯特里茨桥和耶拿桥前,他从成队的煤炭船顶上和洗衣女工的船头上,低着脑袋跳到塞纳河里,所有礼貌和警章全违犯了。不过警察是在注视着的,从而出现了一种具有高度戏剧性的情况,有一次还引起了一种兄弟般的和难忘的呼声,那种呼声在一八三○年前夕是出了名的,那是野孩和野孩间的一种战略性的警告,它的韵律象荷马的诗句,带着一种音调,几乎和巴纳德内节①的埃莱夫西斯②的朗诵调一样无法形容,并且使人想见远古的“哎弗哎”③。野孩的呼声是这样的:“哦哎,Titi,哦哎哎!瘟神来了,对头来了,小心呵,快走开,钻到阴沟里去!”

①巴纳德内节(Panathénées),古代希腊祭雅典娜神的节日。

②埃莱夫西斯(Eleusis),雅典西北一镇。

③“哎弗哎”(Evohé),古代祭祀时女祭司对酒神的欢呼。 

有时这蠓虫棗这是他替自己取的名称棗能识字,有时能写字,随时都能乱画一气。不知通过怎样一种神秘的互教互学,他毫不犹豫地获得一切对待公共事物的才能:从一八一五到一八三○,他学火鸡叫;从一八三○到一八四八,他在墙上画梨儿④。在一个夏季的傍晚,路易-菲力浦步行回家,看见一个极小的野孩,才这么高,淌着汗,踮着脚,在讷伊铁栏门的柱子上正画着一个极大的梨。国王,带着那种来自亨利四世②的老好人神气,帮着那野孩画完了那个梨,还给了那孩子一枚路易,并且说:“梨儿也在这上面了。”③野孩爱吵闹。某些粗暴的作风合他口味。他痛恨“神甫”。一天,在大学街上,有一个那种小淘气对着六十九号大车门做鼻子脚④。“你为什么要对那扇门这样做?”一个过路人问他。那孩子回答说:“里面有个神甫。”那确是教廷使臣的住处。可是,不管野孩的伏尔泰主义是怎么回事,如果他有机会当唱诗童子,他也可能同意,在那种情况下,他也会斯斯文文地望弥撒。有两件事是他经常想到却又始终没有做到的:推翻政府和缝补自己的裤子。

①火鸡和梨都代表愚蠢的人。一八一五到一八三○是波旁王朝复辟时期,一八三○到一八四八是路易-菲力浦的七月王朝时期。

②亨利四世是波旁王室的第一代国王。路易-菲力浦是他的后裔。

③双关语,一方面是画梨的代价,另一方面梨儿也指金币上国王的像。

④做鼻子脚是把大拇指抵着自己的鼻尖并摆动其他四个手指,是对人表示鄙视的手势。 

一个地道的野孩知道巴黎所有的警察,他遇见一个警察,总能对着他的脸叫出他的名字。他能掐着手指把他们一个个数过来。他研究他们的性格,并对他们中每一个都有专门的评语。他能象看一本摊开的书那样了解警察的内心活动。他会流利地熟练地告诉你:“某个是奸贼,某个非常凶,某个伟大,某个可耻。”(所有奸贼、凶、伟大、可耻这些字眼在他嘴里都有一种特殊的意义。)“这家伙以为新桥是他的,不许‘人家’在桥栏杆外面的墩子上玩,那家伙老喜欢扯‘人家’的耳朵”等等。